My family are Christian; I used to be.
It would be nice to think it was all true. It would be nice to believe there was a loving god — or God — watching over us. But I just don't believe that — it just doesn't seem realistic.
Religion is still something I'm interested in. It would be nice if any religion was true, really, since most of them seem to promise either heaven or reincarnation at death — anything but our minds dying with our bodies, our spirits snuffed out like a candle-flame.
It's one reason wannabe stars want fame — to live on in people's minds. It's one reason kind-hearted folk find satisfaction in charity: making a difference in the world. It's one reason troubled teens walk into a high school and start shooting their friends: they want to be remembered.
It's just another way of wanting to live on past death.
A life beyond death — that's a tempting thought, and maybe that's why I keep going back to it.
I'm terrified of death.
I'd almost rather go to hell than simply cease to exist. I hate the thought of everything that's me, every silly joke, every philosophical rambling, every iota of love I've felt for someone, just gone — irrelevant.
So this blog will simply be my jotted-down wonderings, mostly about Christianity, sometimes about other things. I'd like to investigate other beliefs; I don't know a lot about them. I'm trying to keep an open mind — about everything.
